Zara’s story: I have come to value my outside the box thinking

Zara* grew up without a bed and experienced domestic abuse from her mum and brother. After a period of being homeless, she now has an apartment and is looking forward to her future.

I grew up in an extremely dysfunctional environment. We were the poorest people on the street, the garden was a mess, and our house was overrun with mice. We had no carpet, and I had no bed. From the age of 4, I had to fend for myself. 

My mum was an alcoholic, and she was very overbearing, religious and very strict. There was a lot of emotional abuse, and I wasn’t given the same rights as my brother and they both used ‘religion’ as a way to gaslight me.

It was difficult that my mum had a drink problem, as it wasn’t really acceptable in my community.

My mum would project her problems on to me, pretending everything was OK, and my brother was very self-obsessed and very emotionally abusive towards me.

The environment I grew up in was one of complete neglect and my mum actually told me repeatedly she never wanted a girl. 

Despite my fibromyalgia, a condition that causes pain all over the body, I had to work to provide for my family, and I took a job at a bank. Because of the stress of the emotional abuse, I ended up breaking down at work, and I lost my job at the bank. 

I ended up becoming homeless, felt completely broken and lived in a hotel and felt like I couldn’t put myself together. 

I had walked away from my family, my community, a whole city. 

Despite being homeless, I started a Level 2 Beauty Therapy course. 

After that I was in supported accommodation, and I opened up to the homelessness support worker about the abuse I’d experienced, and I got referred to Manchester Women’s Aid. 

While in supported accommodation, the problems didn’t end there. A woman addicted to crack was harassing me, threatening me with her violent, criminal father and I had to be moved for my own safety. 

I am now doing my Level 3 Beauty Therapy Course. I like it because it includes science, business – even physics – how many ions are needed for an electrical massage. 

I’ve also had the opportunity to do workshops at a technology organisation – I’m interested in tech, coding, web design – there’s a whole load of opportunities out there. 

I’ve been homeless for 2 years, but I’ve just been told I’ve got an apartment – it’s a time for new beginnings and even though it’s great, it’s very overwhelming. 

I love to swim, do yoga and meditation and I also started to write music. I was never allowed to be creative growing up, so this is a big change for me. 

I have an entrepreneurial spirit and I’m very goal oriented as demonstrated by doing courses while I’ve been living in temporary accommodation. There wasn’t always a nice atmosphere on the courses, and I can sometimes think, people don’t fully value the opportunities in front of them. 

I want to fund my own dreams, have online growth and give back to charities eventually, such as Manchester Women’s Aid. I have come to value my outside the box thinking, resilience and problem-solving skills. 

*not her real name